Language Lessons

American Life in Poetry: Column 223

There's lots of literature about the loss of innocence, because we all share in that loss and literature is about what we share. Here's a poem by Alexandra Teague, a San Franciscan, in which a child's awakening to the alphabet coincides with another awakening: the unsettling knowledge that all of us don't see things in the same way. 

Language Lessons 

The carpet in the kindergarten room

was alphabet blocks; all of us fidgeting

on bright, primary letters. On the shelf

sat that week's inflatable sound. The th

was shaped like a tooth. We sang

about brushing up and down, practiced

exhaling while touching our tongues

to our teeth. Next week, a puffy U

like an upside-down umbrella; the rest

of the alphabet deflated. Some days,

we saw parents through the windows

to the hallway sky. Look, a fat lady,

a boy beside me giggled. Until then

I'd only known my mother as beautiful.

Parent Child Interview

I asked Izabella and Leo a series of questions that were part of a Facebook meme. Here is the result:

Izabella, 7 (almost 8)

1. What is something I always say to you? I love you.
2. What makes me happy? clowns
3. What makes me sad? Leo hitting me.
4. How do I make you laugh? putting on my clown costume or saying a funny joke
5. What was I like when I was a child? like a clown
6. How old am I? 41
7. How tall am I? 228 cm
8. What is my favorite thing to do? go shopping
9. What do I do when you're not around? go shopping
10. What am I really good at? funniness or shouting at Leo
11. What is something I'm not good at? bicycling
12. What do I do for a job? write books
13. What is my favorite food? rice casserole
14. What do you enjoy doing with me? cuddle

Leo (6 ½)

1. What is something I always say to you? Isn’t it a beautiful day? Or, I love you.
2. What makes me happy? When I am really nice and not fussing and I don’t eat with my hands
3. What makes me sad? If I hit you or I am angry or I hate you or say I don’t love you
4. How do I make you laugh? Saying funny jokes and tickling me
5. What was I like when I was a child? nice
6. How old am I? 42
7. How tall am I? How would I know?
8. What is my favorite thing to do? go outside and have fresh air, cuddle
9. What do I do when you're not around? go shopping, clean the house
10. What am I really good at? Cleaning the house, loving people, being nice, being cute
11. What is something I'm not good at? Lego
12. What do I do for a job? Write a book and take care of us and I think you said you are a teacher
13. What is my favorite food? French fries
14. What do you enjoy doing with me? Cuddling, go shopping

Iza was then inspired to write her own original interview questions for me:

1.Mia kedvenc színed? blue
2.Hány barátod van? 3
3.Hány éves vagy ha 10 évet elveszel? 31
4.Hány éves vagy ha 10 évet hozáadsz? 51
5.Hány gyereked van? 2
6.Hány éves vagy? 41
7.Hányadik osztályban vagy? :)
8.Van 5 almám megetem 2 vásárolok még 2 hány almám van? 5!
9.Mikor születél? November 18, 1974
10.Mia kedvenc éneked? Happy Birthday
11.Mia kedvenc élményed? skydiving with Jason
12.Hol születél? Hutchinson, KS, USA
13.Mia neved? Janet Kay Francesca Kelley
14.Kia kedvenc barátod? Debbie
15.Kika barátaid? Debbie, Akesha, Ashley, Jason
16.Hány éves vagy ha 10+1 évet elveszel? 30
17.Van 6 kutyám 3 kutyám vetem még 1 kutyát hány kutyám van? 9
18.Van 9-3 db gojom kaptam még 6+9 db gojot hány gojom van? 21
19.😀+😄=? Happy!
20.🎁+💖=? Birthday

a big dose of America

Read more about it: http://www.newyorker.com/culture/cultural-comment/anthem-of-freedom-how-whitney-houston-remade-the-star-spangled-banner?mbid=social_facebook

#whitneyhouston
#starspangledbanner
#holy shit

Fries as Destination

Dear Seth,

Meet me in Brussels? Happy to revisit the important work of updating this article with you.

j

Read article here: http://www.nytimes.com/2013/06/11/travel/in-brussels-frites-are-more-than-just-fries.html?_r=1

#bucketlist
#friesasdestination

brilliance

Learned something new today:

The same man, Michael Frayn, wrote "Noises Off" and "Copenhagen." Huh.

http://www.newyorker.com/culture/culture-desk/the-sublime-chaos-of-noises-off?mbid=social_twitter

me. circa 1997 or 8.

did photoshop exist? the selfie did not.

think like a little girl

http://www.firstforwomen.com/posts/little-girl-takes-brilliant-shortcut-to-complete-punishment-assignment-teaches-us-all-a-lesson-88085

Gender Tales: Pink Tax in Budapest

Hold on, I will get to the Pink Tax.

When my daughter started first grade in Budapest in 2014 there was a steep learning curve for both of us.  My expectations about the first-day experience were not met and I was I was deeply shocked by what I considered to be profoundly misguided traditions inconsiderate of children's needs when entering the care of a new school and a new teacher.

Over time I developed a love-hate relationship with the system. No school is perfect. But those striving toward perfection earn my respect. I worry about a system that doesn't seem self-aware, self-critical, or open to the changing needs of its population. However, it should be noted there is a growing teacher rebellion against the nationwide reforms imposed three years ago. The movement is worth your attention and support. Teachers are revolting and parents are revolting by turning away from the public system to open independent new schools.

Back to my local school and my kids. I think it is fair to say that a public school is a perfect microcosm of its culture. (And this will lead me to the Pink Tax, pinkie-swear.)

My current analysis of Hungary is that at the center of its cultural identity is this word:  Tradition. My theory about America is that its central word is:  Independence. These words function in ways that are fascinating to explore and tease out from the news and the arts. These identity tags function.

At the center of the Hungarian school is the notion of tradition with a capital T.

One example of this is the required sports class and its requisite uniform. I was instructed at the parent's meeting to purchase for my daughter a "torna ruha," white socks, and gym shoes with white soles. I get the gym shoes requirement, as it keeps the floors clean.

My first task was to understand "torna ruha." It translates to "gym clothes." However, in the Hungarian tradition (Tradition), this means the girls wear a leotard and the boys wear gym shorts and a white t-shirt. In a classroom of thirty kids they all strip down to their Star Wars skivvies and put on the gym uniform. Right away this signals the gym class is not a play class but a workout. Physical fitness is another lesson, as rigorous as math or reading. I have theories about this too. Seriously, how effective can that be? I know my husband learned to skip gym classes as soon as possible when growing up in a Hungarian school system. But let me stay focussed on the Pink Tax. We are getting there.

After much discussion about the gender imbalance related to requiring girls to wear body-revealing leotards while boys wear comfortable sports clothes, I dutifully went to the sports store. I had resigned to buy my daughter the leotard as well as the shorts and t-shirt. I would pack both and let her decide what worked best for her.

I found the display for the gym clothes. And there it was: The Pink Tax. The leotard cost 2,999 forint (about 10 dollars), which is not cheap. The shorts and the t-shirt combined cost 2,789.  A lesson in the marketplace before the first day of school: It is expensive to be a girl and have the "right" outfit! Granted, the price was only slightly more for the girl outfit. But there it is. Not only does the Tradition expect her to wear a body-revealing costume, it expects her to pay more for it (for less material).

It still makes my blood boil, roiling with pink bubbles of indignation.

#worldwidepinktax
#ugh
#gendertales
#budapest


FYI: More on the pink tax:  http://time.com/4159973/women-pay-more-everything/

this is marriage

best wedding ritual ever

#holyshit

#HAKAatweddingreception

‪#‎ProudPolynesians‬

Thunderstruck

or, my high school homecoming theme song circa 1990-ishsomthing. only cooler.

although the hundreds of foil-covered lightening bolts we made by hand and hung from the lunchroom ceiling were very atmospheric. and the bold choice of an AC/DC song instead of say, Extreme's "More than Words," was absolutely cool. this video, however, still cooler.